Welcome to the holiday season everyone! I wanted to take a moment away from all of the craziness to give you an update. I'm not sure where to start exactly except to say things are going pretty well. Three months ago I had no intention of being where I am now. Where is that? In a happy, committed relationship with a man who is not at all the man I ever imagined I would be with.
Scott and I have been together for two and a half months now. For me to be involved with a man for two and a half months isn't all that uncommon. The only difference is that in the past I would have seen him two or three times during that duration and I spend upwards of 5 nights a week with Scott. A month ago I injured myself at work and have been out on disability ever since. My concern was that Scott and I would be able to spend time together in a way we hadn't been able to before and that the results would be less than fantastic. It's easy to spend many evenings with someone when most of it is spent sleeping. We work opposite schedules so while he was spending the weekends relaxing and having fun, I was at work. When he was dreading Monday morning and returning to work, I was looking forward to a much needed day off. Now we are able to spend a lot of "quality time" together and I feared we might drive each other crazy.
Turns out I was wrong. Not only have we not driven each other crazy over the last four weeks but we've actually grown closer. Often times I am waiting for him when he comes home from work, dinner either in the oven or on the way. I get up with him in the morning when he goes to work and generally head back to my place to spend time with my cat. We spend the weekends in the country or running around or having dinner with his family. In short, it's wonderful! I have never worked a "normal" work schedule in my life and have never wanted to but suddenly I am longing to have a regular 9 to 5 kind of job so I can spend my evenings and weekends with Scott.
Don't get me wrong, it's not all sunshine and lollipops. He and I are two VERY different people. He spends hours every day listening to or watching The Howard Stern Show which I can only stomach in small doses. I like to watch intelligent and heartfelt dramas and So You Think You Can Dance, which is less appealing to him than watching grass grow. Politically we don't see eye to eye on much and socially we have very dissimilar viewpoints. All of these things lead to arguments, disagreements, sometimes even fights, of which we've had a couple of good ones. But it is the first time I have ever stuck it out with someone, or felt it was worth voicing my own opinions against his. At the end of the day we take care of each other and make the other person smile. A lot.
Where are we? Well, when it came time for me to think about resigning me lease at the end of the year Scott suggested I move in with him. I've thought and thought about and finally came to the conclusion that "yes, this is something we should do." I've thought better of it though. What we have is good but it is new. The possibility that we will end up taking that step in a couple of months is pretty high, but I don't want to ruin something that could be really great by diving into it too quickly.
I have thought for a couple of years that I have been ready to make the ultimate of commitments, but the truth is now that I am with someone with whom that possibility is a reality, not just a fantasy, it is kind of scary. Life with someone whom I know is there when I need him is so much better than I could have ever imagined, yet I find myself thinking with sadness that I may never go on a first date again! I hear this will pass. I've always enjoyed my single life, even during the nights that found me crying tears of loneliness, but falling asleep next to a heavy snorer is more soothing than I ever dreamed.
So for now, things are good. They're great! For the first time ever I am shopping for Christmas gifts for a man I love and that excites me to no end! Almost as exciting is the pile of boxes in the trunk of his car that I'm not allowed to look at. Looking ahead I don't think I'll be adding anymore numbers to my quest before June, but you never know. If things go terribly wrong with Scott I will probably need to go out with a different guy every night just to distract me from the heartache that loss would cause! And you will all be the first to know! I miss the new, interesting people and the stories they all brought. Perhaps I can find something else to write about now.
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